


I Was a Teenage Were-Goat

by MoonCat457



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Werecreatures, Animagus, Crack, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, Full Moon, Getting Together, Kissing, M/M, Marauders Era (Harry Potter), RSCandyHearts, Valentine's Day, Valentine's Day Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-01
Updated: 2021-03-01
Packaged: 2021-03-14 07:09:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,570
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29788299
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MoonCat457/pseuds/MoonCat457
Summary: When the Marauders become animagi to help Remus with his “furry little problem” they discover that he has another secret, one that Sirius finds absolutely adorable. Of course, Sirius always finds Remus adorable.
Relationships: Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Comments: 12
Kudos: 49
Collections: The Candy Hearts Challenge





	I Was a Teenage Were-Goat

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Kattlupin](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kattlupin/gifts).



> Written for [goodboylupin](https://archiveofourown.org/users/somebetterwords/pseuds/goodboylupin)’s RS Candy Hearts Mini-fest.  
>   
> Prompt: GOAT  
> 

Remus sits cross-legged on a dusty mattress in the Shrieking Shack, a threadbare blanket wrapped around his bare shoulders. He can’t see the moon through the boarded-up windows, but he can tell how long he had until the moon was at its peak based purely on feel. Ten minutes. Ten minutes before his body would contort itself into the form of—

“Moony!” The door crashes open, and in come his roommates, lead by Sirius. 

Remus is too shocked by the fact that his three best friends are standing in front of him minutes before he’s set to transform to feel his usual stomach flutter at how roguishly handsome Sirius looks with his long, silky black hair wound up into a messy bun with his wand struck through it. “What are you doing here?” he splutters, wrapping the quilt tighter around himself.

“We’re here to keep you company!” Peter exclaims, bouncing on his toes in excitement.

“You can’t! I could hurt you, or bite you, and then you’d be—”

“Don’t worry, Moons,” Sirius says, grinning wildly. “We figured it out. Werewolf infection only works on humans, so if we aren’t human, then no problem.”

Remus can feel his body starting to ache, so he knows he has only a minute or two left. “Sirius, I don’t know what you’re saying.”

“We became animagi!” James says proudly, then, without any more warning, he, Sirius, and Peter all transform: James into a stag, Sirius into a massive black shaggy dog, and Peter into—well, Remus can’t quite see because it looks as if he’s disappeared altogether. Then, as quickly as they became animals, they become human again.

“See! So now we can keep you company!” Sirius beams.

Remus stares blankly at them. “No, you can’t. It’s—”

“It’s perfectly safe, Remus. We worked it all out,” Peter interrupts.

“No, it’s—There’s something I didn’t tell you before that—Argh!” Remus feels his bones start to crack. This is it. The transformation is beginning, and there isn’t time for him to explain that he had been keeping a secret from them ever since they confronted him about being a werewolf. Except, he isn’t a werewolf. He is a were, but he doesn’t transform into a wolf once a month, and now, his three best friends were about to find that out first hand.

His bones crack again, and he lets out a strangled groan. “Quick, transform before it’s too late.”

The last thing Remus see was his three friends shift into their animal forms; then, everything went black. 

—

Sirius sits on the edge of Remus’ bed in the back corner of the hospital wing, his hand resting atop Remus’. 

James shoots him a knowing look from his seat in a chair on the other side of the bed. 

“Shut up,” Sirius hisses, returning James’ look with a glare.

“I didn’t say anything,” James says innocently. 

“Oh, I think he’s waking up,” Peter says, and Sirius quickly jerks his hand away, earning another knowing look from James. 

Remus groans slightly and slowly bats his eyes open. His gaze goes to Sirius first.

“Sirius?” Remus looks to James and Peter. “James? Pete? What are you doing here?” 

“Hey, Moons,” Sirius whispers, giving him a soft smile. “We wanted to see how you were feeling.”

“How’s your head?” Peter asks, doing his best to keep his face neutral.

“Yeah, you conked it pretty good last night trying to headbutt your way out of the room,” James adds, stifling a laugh. 

Peter breaks first, snickering softly, followed by James and Sirius. 

“I’m so sorry!” Remus lets out an uncharacteristic sound that Sirius could only describe as a squeak. “You went through all this trouble to become animagi to help me, only to find out that I’m not even a fearsome creature who needs controlling. You lot must hate me.”

“We don’t hate you,” Sirius says. 

“Why would we hate you?” James asks, coughing to cover his residual laughter. 

“I lied?”

“Why did you lie?” James asks gently. 

“Because I’m a freaking were-goat!” Remus exclaims. “I’m a bloody goat who gives himself concussions once a month because he won’t stop headbutting stuff. It’s embarrassing!”

“It’s not that embarrassing,” Sirius offers. “If it helps, you were a really cute were-goat, at least.”

Remus stares at him for a moment, then groans and pulls a pillow over his face. 

“I don’t think that helped,” Peter whispers. 

“Yeah, I got that, Pete,” Sirius snaps. 

“Come on, Rem. We aren’t mad.” Sirius tries to pull the pillow away, but Remus holds on with a surprising amount of energy for being post-full moon. “We had fun last night. Once you realized that the stag, dog, and rat in the room were friends and not threats, anyway. Speaking of, I think we need nicknames for our animal forms, seeing as Rem already has Moony—ah-ha!” Sirius lets out a triumphant shout as he manages to wrestle the pillow away from Remus’ face. He smiles down at Remus, who gives him a sad look.

Remus sighs. “You’re really not mad—Sirius! What happened to your face?” 

Sirius shrugs and tries to smooth his hair over the developing bruise and scrape on his temple. “It’s nothing.”

Remus sits up sharply. “What happened?”

“Goat horns are just harder than they look. Luckily I have a hard head, even as a dog,” Sirius says with an awkward chuckle.

Remus’ eyes go glassy as he stares at the bruise. “I never wanted any of you to get hurt.” 

Sirius shakes his head. “I’m fine, really.” He looks to James and Peter for help.

“So are we,” James says, and Peter nods in agreement.

“Besides,” Sirius continues, looking back at Remus, “according to Madame Pomfrey, this is the best she’s ever seen you post-moon. I would happily suffer through a bruise and a mild headache every month if it meant your transformations took less of a toll on you. So don’t worry about it, ok, Rem?”

Remus sighs again and lifts a hand to brush Sirius’s hair back to look at the bruise better. “You’re sure you’re alright?”

Sirius smiles softly and reaches for Remus’ free hand. “Promise,” he whispers, giving Remus’ hand a squeeze.

Out of the corner of his eye, Sirius catches James and Peter sharing a knowing look.

“Pete, I think that’s our cue,” James says.

Remus opens his mouth to say something, but James and Peter have already pulled the curtain divider to give them privacy and are halfway to the door.

“What was that about?” Remus asks.

“I’m not fully sure,” Sirius begins, “but if I had to guess, James was trying to wingman for me.”

Remus gives him a funny look and looks to his left hand, tangled in Sirius’ hair, then his right, entwined with Sirius’ left hand. His eyes widen, and he tries to pull away, but Sirius doesn’t let him. 

“Oh,” Remus breathes. 

Sirius gives him a nervous smirk. “Yeah.” 

He reaches his free hand up to caress Remus’ cheek, brushing his cheekbone with his thumb. They gaze into each other’s eyes for a long moment, then they’re kissing. It’s nothing more than a soft, slow press of the lips, and Sirius isn’t quite sure who leaned in first, but it doesn’t matter. It’s perfect.

They break apart, and Sirius brushes his nose against Remus’ with a smile before pulling away. 

“So, now what?” Remus wonders as he settles back into his pillows.

“No idea. This wasn’t really the plan,” Sirius admits. 

“The plan?”

“I hatched a whole plan. There was going to be chocolates and anonymous notes with clues leading up to a date in Hogsmeade next Saturday where you found out that I was your secret admirer. But then you gave me that look and touched my face, and… well, things got all out of order.”

“Saturday as in Valentine’s Day?”

Sirius chews on the corner of his lip. “Too corny?”

Remus smiles and shakes his head. “No. That actually sounds really sweet.”

“Yeah? Well, I could proceed as planned.”

“I don’t think the secret admirer part is necessary anymore, but I will happily accept the chocolate and go to Hogsmeade with you.”

Sirius grins. “Does this mean you’ll be my Valentine, then?”

Remus laughs and sits up to kiss his cheek. “Yes, I will be your Valentine.” He sits up straighter to kiss his temple. “For your headache. I’m sorry I headbutted you.”

“It wasn’t you. It was the were-goat,” Sirius corrects firmly. “You—” he presses a kiss to Remus’ forehead—“are not the were-goat.”

Remus opens his mouth to protest, but Sirius cuts him off with a quick kiss. 

“Although, it was just as clumsy as you are. It kept jumping around and falling over. It was adorable.”

Remus groans and falls against the pillows, then pulls the blankets over his head. 

“No, no hiding,” Sirius says, trying to pull the blankets away. “I can’t kiss you if you’re hiding.”

Remus pokes his eyes out over the top of the blankets. “Well, less making fun of me and more kissing me, then.”

“I’m not making fun of you. I just find everything about you cute—even in goat form. But I will happily shut up if it means I can keep kissing you.” Sirius smirks and motions for Remus to scoot over so he can climb onto the bed. He wraps an arm around Remus’ shoulders and kisses him. 

**Author's Note:**

> Follow me on [Tumblr](https://mooncat457writing.tumblr.com/)!


End file.
